Posts tagged with change.

University changes your relationship with your kids

Kathy Dobson, July 15, 2009 at 11:57 AM

I'm still not exactly sure when the transition happened. Maybe it was when they got part-time jobs. Or maybe it was when they started drinking coffee. Either way, my two oldest children aren't... well... children anymore.

They're adults.

Okay, after finishing a year of university, they're still not full-fledged adults. They're quasi-adults. But sometime between last September and this summer they took a huge step towards adulthood.

Unlike previous summers, I can't order them to go outside and play anymore. Or to go clean their rooms. If it's cold outside, I have to resist the urge to tell them to put on a sweater.

Throughout the school year, I never even thought to nag them about their homework. Back when they were in grade 12, I would remind them not to fall behind on their science fair projects. But this year, I didn't remind them about upcoming tests or assignments. It would have seemed somehow... disrespectful.

I also didn't pack them a sandwich and cookies for their lunches. They did. Well, at least I think they did. Maybe they didn't even eat lunch.

Of course, some things have not only changed, they've also been completely removed from my parental responsibilities. Like my children's friends. These days, unlike my three youngest, I rarely get to meet the parents of my two oldest's friends.

Actually, I don't even meet a lot of their friends.

When they get together with friends, there's no playing tag or hide-and-seek in the backyard. They don't play Xbox in the living room.

They meet at Tim Horton's. Or study together at the library. Now I feel lucky when they occasionally hang out in the basement.

Never mind room-cleaning and homework nagging. In just over a year, our relationship has irreversibly evolved. Sometimes I can't believe just how much has already changed.

I admit it. I find it a little scary how fast things are changing. But I accept it as normal, healthy, and absolutely necessary.

I just wish the changes would wait up for me.

Tagged with children, university, parents, relationships, change | Comments (16) |